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KIDS OF CHARACTER 3/15/2009
Excuse Making Versus Accountability There are plenty of ways to make excuses for our actions. Elementary school teachers often hear a boatload of excuses from their students regarding mysteriously lost assignments, permission slips not seen or signed by parents, homework thrown out or eaten by the dog. Many kids become addicted to making excuses for failing to be accountable. I know that parents can be enablers for their children's excuses. There isn't a parent among us, including yours truly, who hasn't covered for their kid at one time or another. So where's the rub with the excuse making? Over time, if given permission, children can easily fall victim to the failed belief that making excuses is the way to handle their responsibilities. A few years ago, my youngest daughter interviewed for a first-time job at a restaurant. When she got home from her successful interview, I asked her what kind of questions she was asked. She said the interviewer asked her: What if you got an order wrong from a customer. How would you handle it? What if you misplaced some money accidentally and found it later? How would you communicate your error? Those are great questions for a teen to consider in a job interview. They suggest significant insight for young people who are seeking to become kids of character. Yes, we make mistakes. Yes, we forget, misplace and lose things. When the mistake occurs, do we burp up a lame excuse or do we become the champion of accountability? Teachers, employers and parents want accountability. To get it they must teach it. They must let kids know that it is better to own up to a mistake than it is to pass it off with excuse-making. Mentors need to help young people to understand a basic character lesson: every action has a consequence…good or bad. Sometimes the methodology of teaching the accountability lesson of consequences means tender encouragement; other times it means tough love. In the end Kids of Character learn: I am responsible and accountable for my actions.
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